Cookie Monster

You really gotta feel bad for Cookie Monster. His whole purpose in life is to eat cookies, and he doesn't even have a throat.

Dear Curlers

Dear Curlers,

Why don't you just sweep the ice before you curl?

Rappers

Does anyone know why every rapper, ABSOLUTELY MUST , have a phone call skit on their album ? Are rappers responsible for making the household phone as popular as it is today?

Diary Entries from a Baby in the Womb

Dear diary,

Month 9

Holy fuck its getting hot up in this motha!!!

- Baby

Milf Hunting

Are you trying to approach that special MILF, but you feel you would look too immature ?
Grow a mustache and tuck in your T Shirt ! .... Why didn't you think of that ?

A&W is setting the bar high with a new burger

After almost 90 years in the grease slangin business, A&W has recently gone leaps and bounds beyond the old, boring, immediate family burgers, they've really ventured into some uncharted grease with......... THE UNCLE BURGER!!!!!

Here are some more hip new burger names I really think they should run with.

The 3rd cousin who taught me how to smoke cigrits burger
The mom's new boyfriend who beats me burger
The drunk driving, womanizing, great uncle Fred burger
The great uncle, twice removed, Chester the molester burger

New Ideas for Talent Shows

So You think you Can Chug Horse Piss.

or The x rated... so you think you can fuck